The Rice Thresher is currently earning some shock-and-eww attention for a column in yesterday’s issue that provides advice and perspectives on sexual activity during a woman’s “time of the month.”
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Responding to a “skeptical but interested” female student’s question about whether she should engage in “period sex,” a pair of columnists at the Rice University student newspaper offer their takes. It is the male columnist receiving a bit of “wait, what?” buzz for an answer that includes the terms immensely disgusted, pervert, horrible plague, horrible turbulence, airplane food, and really, really gross.
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Writing under the pseudonym Ares, he compares period sex to jumping into “a lake . . . filled with blood,” swimming in the ocean during “shark week,” and starring in “There Will Be Blood” (I’m guessing specifically the scene at the end involving a bowling ball bludgeoning).
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A portion of Ares’s sacred words: “When I first read this question, I was immensely disgusted. Naturally, I turned to the Bible for help. While it is true that Moses parted the Red Sea, this is in no way a thumbs up from the Holy Book. In fact, those celebrating Passover next week will remember that turning the rivers into blood was a horrible plague designed to punish the Egyptians. From what I can tell, none of the Pharaoh’s people used the opportunity to get it on in the churning river of red blood cells. A quick search through Leviticus further reveals that while the Bible has many bloodbaths, you shouldn’t have one in bed.”
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Oh, Ares, you sure know how to make the ladies swoon . . . or not. As a Jezebel post contends, “His Bible riff is so dumb that I thought it was a setup for an eventual, ‘JK, period sex is chill’ type of conclusion . . . but, nah, he just thinks period sex is ‘really, really gross.’”
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The second response from female columnist Athena is much tamer, citing the need for communication, consideration of pregnancy and STI infections, and “your partner’s comfort.” A snippet: “Some women have reported elevated feelings and enjoying sex more while on their periods, but period sex can also result in some sticky situations.”
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My Take: As the individual who has read more student love and sex columns than anyone on Earth (hey, I wrote a book on them), I can confirm this topic pops up every once in awhile in campus newspapers everywhere. I admit I have never come across an anti-period-sex perspective quite so inflammatory (or Biblically-inclined). Refuting Jezebel’s informed analysis though, I do think it’s so over-the-top that the joke is on us. Somewhere in Texas, Aries is laughing at this mini-controversy, probably while watching Daniel Day-Lewis movies. Happy Friday. :)
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