Posts Tagged ‘Love’

Disappearing chivalry.  Twenty-first century virgins.  Girl flirting.  Lesbian chic. Hairy faces.  Lust at first sight.  Internet porn.  Two “Fifty Shades of Grey” smackdowns.  And one very expensive condom.

Below is a sampling of recent– or at least recently spotted– top-notch student press columns and features on sex, love, and other undergrad socialization tendencies.

Please email or tweet me to add your sex & love story to the mix.

The Golden Gate Xpress, San Francisco State University

Is chivalry dead? Maybe not, but it’s certainly on its deathbed. . . . It has been my observation in my years at SF State as a college student that this concept has skipped the latter of my generation. The act of holding doors open, pulling out chairs or buying one of those adorable vodka cranberries that girls love doesn’t seem to be important anymore.  Now, I don’t know if this is due to our interpersonal communication skills being jaded by advancements in technology where we can’t communicate without an ‘OMG,’ or if it is just how we grew up.”

The Daily Californian, University of California, Berkeley

This column is not about ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ because, frankly, reading that book pissed me off. Reading about how undeserving a woman thinks she is of a prototypical alpha-male is not sexually arousing. ‘Fifty Shades’ did not provide any of the provocative mind-fucks I was anticipating. This column is about BDSM and the wonders of bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism and masochism, which ‘Fifty Shades’ failed to mention.”

The Mooring Mast, Pacific Lutheran University

My main criticism of the novel, besides James’s apparent inability to write– don’t get me started on the ‘inner goddess’ thing– is her misrepresentation of the BDSM lifestyle and members of the community.  Grey frequently blames his need for dominance on an abusive childhood, referring to himself as ‘fifty shades of f—ed up.’  A 2002 study of 132 members of the BDSM community by The Guardian writer Pamela Stephenson, showed that only a few cases of adult BDSM practice were related to childhood abuse and participants in the study were generally not mentally unhealthy.”

State Press Magazine, Arizona State University

Compliments are the universal language of females. As long as they are genuine, we melt in their presence, automatically intrigued by the girl who has graced us with such a beautiful gift.  Use and abuse this power to your advantage. Instead of getting jealous of that super- cool girl on the street with impeccable style, walk up to her and ask her where she acquired her taste.”

State Press Magazine, Arizona State University

The Daily Trojan, University of Southern California

[I]t’s impossible to ignore the strange backlash that many virgins receive.  But that would only be an issue if today’s virgin didn’t go through such a dramatic transformation. Say goodbye to the diminutive, austere virgin of yesteryear — the 21st century virgin is a force to be reckoned with. Though some still fit the stereotype of a Bible-wielding puritan, there has been a rise of young girls and guys who are in no rush to get between the sheets, yet also have no problem having the time of their lives.”

The Massachusetts Daily Collegian, UMass

According to Style.com, ‘lesbian chic’ is in vogue right now. By making lesbianism a fashion statement of wearing Doc Martens and having a pixie cut, it is reducing the choice of sexuality to a passing fad. In reviewing ‘lesbian chic,’ Style.com reported women preferring to wear flats and sneakers instead of high heels and the incorporation of baseball caps into everyday outfits for women.  Citing the beginning of a sexual revolution as the moment women choose not to subject themselves to a night on the town in four-inch stiletto heels seems a bit egregious to me.”

The Connection, Cosumnes River College

[M]arket branding everything has reached a new all-time height with the Luis Vuitton condom, yes I shall repeat myself Luis Vuitton has a condom line.  At $68 per condom, yes folks per condom, it is the most expensive condom currently in the world beating out channel 21’s condom line which sold at $279 a dozen.”

The Daily Nexus, University of California, Santa Barbara

In sex, there is virtually always an active role and a passive role. . . . In normal, coital sex, the active role is assumed to be the male and the passive role by the female. And thus in a single sentence I have managed to identify exactly what is problematic in our contemporary formulation of sexual power– that the passive role is passive, and the active role is active. In this terminology, power is inherently unbalanced, and it casts the woman in an immediately weaker light.”

The Towerlight, Towson University

“Alright, so picture this: you’re a guy.  You’re hanging out with your girlfriend, drinking peppermint coffee and snuggling under blankets staying warm from the crisp November weather.  Your snuggle time is escalating when suddenly you realize-she didn’t shave her legs.  Well, you wanted to cuddle with your girlfriend, not the enchanted forest.”

The Daily Toreador, Texas Tech University

[M]ost college women don’t know what they want, just like most college men don’t know what they want.  Actually, let me revise this further to say that we may know what we want, but we just don’t know how to get it. Most women want someone who reminds them of their father in regards to how they treat them. They want someone who is masculine, financially secure and who will take care of them and secure a future for them.  Most men want a respectable woman who may remind them of their mother, though it should be noted that most men would not want to see their mother in a club dancing on the stage every weekend. Neither gender, however, seem to be chasing these types of people.”

The Middlebury Campus, Middlebury College

I turn off the lights and open my laptop. I begin browsing. What will it be this time. Amateur? Three-way? Anal? It hardly matters. Women scream. Men grunt. Cum sprays across stomachs, backs and faces. Everyone looks miserable. They even cry out in semi-erotic shrieks, as if to indicate their torture.  Don’t get me wrong, the nudity and the visual impact arouse me, but my repulsion supersedes my lust. . . . A major change has occurred recently, however the advent of the internet, which has increased the pervasiveness of pornography exponentially, affects our communal sexual psyche.”

The Spartan Daily, San Jose State University

It is said to be ‘love at first sight.’  But is it really love in that moment of first laying eyes on someone?  I like to call it ‘lust at first sight,’ only because if you love someone the instant you meet them, you are probably just as creepy as Robin Williams’ character in ‘One Hour Photo.’”

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Below is a screenshot sampling of recently published columns in student news outlets nationwide directly tackling matters of sex and love.  Open relationships, love triangles, sexual consent, sexy music, and the sexual side effects of so-called happiness drugs all make appearances.  Happy Monday!

Her Campus

“It seems like a successful open relationship is like a unicorn– you have heard about their existence but have never actually seen a real one, as the horses you mistake for the mythical creature are just really good at pretending. . . .”

The Daily Californian, UC Berkeley

“Sex, more than anything else, is all about setting the mood. Lights, scents, location and scenery are all factors that make or break the experience. Yet above all, there’s the music; music is the food of love. . . .”  (By the way, for those scoring at home, the six stages are Prelude, Foreplay, Sex, Interlude, Orgasm, and Afterglow.)

The Miami Hurricane, U of Miami

“I’m not sure if what I’m doing is completely wrong or completely warranted. My best friend and his girlfriend have been dating for about three years. But for about the past five or six months, she and I have been hooking up, and he doesn’t know about it. . . .”

The McGill Daily, McGill University

“The list of conditions that fall under that term [sexual dysfunction] could hold its own in a fine-print contest.  In no particular order: no or lower libido, delayed orgasm, anorgasmia (no orgasm), pleasureless orgasm, erectile dysfunction, problems with arousal (unspecified), and possibly genital anesthesia (in which genitals are no more useful for pleasure than, say, your arm is). . . .”

The Daily Evergreen, Washington State

“It is so rare for me to make eye contact with someone that when I do, I can’t help it. My socially-deprived brain goes into hyperdrive producing overwhelming scenarios stolen from that rubbish known as romantic comedy. By the time I am able to replenish my brain’s oxygen specimen B is already long gone and I look up only for it to happen all over again. . . .”

The Daily Pennsylvanian, Penn

“Let’s say you go to Blarney’s tonight and after pounding back enough beer to flood all of Locust Walk, you leave with someone. You perform a sloppy, drunken version of the horizontal tango and when you wake up in the morning, your hangover is tinged with regret.  Were you raped? . . .”

The Pitt News, University of Pittsburgh

“In fifth grade, I was the first girl in my class to wear a bra.  My measly 32AA training bra held up the “breasts” I’d developed earlier than the rest of my classmates. For an 11-year-old, I was well-endowed– a physical trait that did not follow me past my middle school years.  Wearing a bra was more of a nuisance than a blessing. . . .”

The Nevada Sagebrush, UNR

“Leah Daigle, an associate professor of criminal justice and criminology at Georgia State University, said only about 5 percent of sexual assaults on college campuses are reported to authorities. . . . ‘Women on college campuses don’t routinely tell police,’ Daigle said. ‘But they do tell somebody. So they are disclosing their experiences, usually to their friends.’ . . .”

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Today’s sole winner of this recurring giggly headline feature is a doozy published recently atop a column in The Cornell Daily Sun.  The interesting piece by Cornell senior Cristina Stiller discusses what she feels are the downsides of the classic one-night stand.  As the column’s headline teases, “Bananas, Nose-Squashing and Heartbreak: The Hazards of Hooking Up.

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Below is a screenshot sampling of recently published columns in student news outlets nationwide directly tackling matters of sex and love.  Facebook dating etiquette, the hook-up culture, student singledom, BDSM, appropriate first date makeup, and anal sex all make appearances.  Happy Wednesday!

The Johns Hopkins News-Letter, JHU

“Single life is just as much of an adventure as life in a relationship. The only difference is that it’s an adventure with yourself. It’s a chance to devote yourself to your wants and your needs because taking care of yourself should be your #1 priority. . . .”

The Heights, Boston College

“‘I think that drinking fosters the hook-up culture,’ [a BC student] said. ‘Ninety percent, if not more, of random hook-ups happen not because you’re drunk but because you’re at a party with drinking. I don’t think being drunk is a reason why people hook up, but it definitely facilitates it. . . .’”

The Good Five Cent Cigar, University of Rhode Island

(This piece was actually published in 2006, but remains atop the paper’s “Most Popular” articles list.) “When my good friend Abigail told me of her problem last semester I thought that she was making it up at first. She told me that she broke up with her last boyfriend because one night as they were about to have sex . . . he took it upon himself to attempt the unthinkable: he tried to enter through the back door. . . .”

The Post, Ohio University

“Diet, exercise and sex all hold one common thread. It’s not just that they’re all essential to the tapestry of life; it is moderation, which dominates all three.  Too much of a good thing is bad, which can be a good thing for those following the BDSM (bondage and discipline, sadism and masochism) lifestyle. . . .”

The Daily Campus, UCONN

“In college, Facebook is somewhat of a quasi-dating website for people that have already met one another. It’s a way to get to pre-screen (read: judge) a person without really getting to know them all that well. Here are my basic rules for Facebook when it comes to courtship rituals and dating. . . .”

College Fashion

“First date makeup is a little tricky: You want to look polished and like you put effort into looking nice, but you still want to look effortless . . . if that made any sense. A first date is not the time to whip out your darkest smokey eye or reddest lipstick, but rather a chance to enhance your own natural features. . . .”

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A fun podcast I just came across on The Daily Californian‘s website debates the date-ability of the major contenders in the 2012 presidential race.  Filmed last month, the recording offers several laugh-out-loud moments, including asides about Rick Perry’s probable first date involving “getting drunk on Jack Daniels and going to the county fair” and Michelle Bachmann being the “crazy ex who would call you up at all hours.”

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